How to Manage Millennials w/ Jay Abraham

by | Jul 11, 2018 | Blog | 0 comments

Jay Abraham is an old friend to Chet Holmes International. He’s known to the world as the ultimate business strategist with 10,000 personal clients serving in over 7,000 different industries. He is a plethora of wisdom on building empires. Forbes has voted him one of the top business coaches in the US and you’ll obviously see from this interview he understands business at a whole new level.

In this interview Entrepreneur Weekly host Alan Taylor and our very own CEO Amanda Holmes, interview Jay Abraham on how to adapt in a world full of millennials in the workforce. Jay lists numerous examples of exactly what you can do to make millennials, and really any generation, perform at peak levels.

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Alan Taylor: [00:00:00] Hi everybody and welcome to the traffic and conversion conference 2018. I’m Alan Taylor here in San Diego with Amanda Holmes CEO of Chet Holmes International. My sidekick but today I think I’m her sidekick as she knows everybody here. It’s like everybody’s walking by going “Amanda, Amanda you have hair!” There’s a long story everybody if you look her up, Amanda Holmes you’ll understand she didn’t have hair for a while. By choice right. And Jay Abraham is here he is. He’s an icon. But you have your dad talks about him in his book The Ultimate sales machine. Over and over and over and I thought to myself and I get to meet this guy today. But first of all I want to you tell us about your relationship with Jay Abraham and how long you’ve known him.

Amanda Holmes: [00:00:48] Just for those that maybe want to know a little bit more in the backstory Jay has worked with over 10000 clients in 400 industries and 7200 sub industries.

Jay Abraham: [00:01:00] Actually yeah the industry count is a thousand actual ones are not being rude it’s just grown since then. We stopped counting on the sub industries. .

Alan Taylor: [00:01:14] Tell the world what you do. How would you describe yourself.

Jay Abraham: [00:01:18] I am a combination of business growth. I would say Master or expert but I’m also a masterful thinking partner who collaborates with entrepreneurs who want to dramatically grow a business predicated on high performance geometric thinking and also outrages preeminent contributions and value creation for their marketplace so it’s a duality.

Jay Abraham: [00:01:47] It’s knowing how to grow a business really explosively but only knowing how to do it if your business is rendering some kind of really significant premier value beyond and above the competition.

Alan Taylor: [00:02:02] You know hearing Chet Holmes talk about you in his book. He had he had a tremendous amount of respect for you. I mean for a guy like Chet Holmes to quote Jay Abraham.

Jay Abraham: [00:02:14] And I had respect for him.

Alan Taylor: [00:02:15] It was a mutual thing that.

Jay Abraham: [00:02:17] Yes.

Alan Taylor: [00:02:18] Maybe you could for a moment. What was it like working with him. I’m just curious because I never got to meet. I get to meet his wonderful daughter who I love so much. Yes but I mean I would love to have been able to meet Chet.

Jay Abraham: [00:02:28] I’ll tell you what he was a really unique and a very focused person who was dingavitivable in his work ethic. He was very creative. He was very disciplined. He had a formulation of 12 or 15 key drivers in his business growth philosophy and he integrated them very masterfully. And I don’t think I ever saw anyone who really prepared better for whatever he was going to do or whoever he was going to do it for and he understood a different spectrum of business growth that I did. Which is why we got along he brought.

Alan Taylor: [00:03:13] The ying and yang.

Jay Abraham: [00:03:14] He brought to a really good contrast but it worked really well together and he was willing to work is ass off for anybody he cared about is a very impressive man.

Alan Taylor: [00:03:26] Also I understand you were there at the birth of Entrepreneur magazine.

Jay Abraham: [00:03:31] I was indeed.

Alan Taylor: [00:03:32] Is that cool.

Jay Abraham: [00:03:34] Is was like the Wild West. It’s a wonderful experience and it’s a hilarious story. And it was really a fascinating era of evolution in the terms of the literally the entrepreneurial spirit of the world.

Alan Taylor: [00:03:57] It’s interesting that you and I I mean we’re kind of the old men of the sea of this business you might say. And now today we have Amanda Holmes 30 just 30.

Jay Abraham: [00:04:06] Yes.

Alan Taylor: [00:04:07] And I find that I am following her around to learn what the millennials are doing and what the young people are doing because it’s a new frontier for them.

Jay Abraham: [00:04:16] Yes.

Alan Taylor: [00:04:17] And we’re the old you know skull and crossbones out in the desert at this point. I mean not so much you and not so much on your present day. I mean these young people are killing it.

Jay Abraham: [00:04:29] I’ll play a little bit of wretched ideological havick with you. I think that there’s a really interesting counter perspective. I’ve had the great privilege of collaborating with about 20 very prominent iconic influencers to millennials and I think millennials are a thirst they have a unquenchable thirst for guidance for meaning for greater connectivity. In how to optimize the performance the success the fulfillment the impact of their lives and I’ve been very very blessed and very delighted to have had influence on a lot of them.

Jay Abraham: [00:05:14] So I think that the old and the young can come together as long as you’re not trying to be admonishing them or castigating them if you’re trying to share adaptive and translative experiences that they don’t have the context of understanding and you’re trying to put them in a form that can be related to them you can really you can propel them to an enormous level. I think too many of us old guys try to castrate, is what you said castrate?

Jay Abraham: [00:05:46] Castigate.

Alan Taylor: [00:05:48] OK Amanda go ahead.

Amanda Holmes: [00:05:54] I had an article in INC that went viral because it was talking about how to work with millennials because everybody’s trying to figure it out right. We’re just kind of a different breed as every generation is the way we operate in a different way. My mom was just telling me she’d never learned a computer class she’d never taken a class in computers which just blew my mind right. It’s just different generations but in my article it just said that we have same the same moral values and if we can connect and language aside realizing that we may use different language there’s still that core inherent thing that brings us together. Do you have any takeaways that we could take away from how to better interact so you said yes we can encourage them instead of bring them down.

Jay Abraham: [00:06:42] If you want to go through a really rapidity of of thoughts I’ll tell you what has resonated very universally with almost all of them. And I’ve done both organizations that were venture capitalists that were funding under 26 year old entrepreneurs that were technology people who were mostly engineers I’ve done a lot of the iconic people here’s what I’ve found. First of all I’ll give you context. There’s no human being I know old or young educated or not who doesn’t want to be greater.

[00:07:17] And what they do they just don’t know what greatness looks like both in how it feels how it changes your thought process how it manifests in your expression and how it is received by people. What I’ve done with millennials is try to explain to them number one that they can rule the world. If a they learn first of all to listen and second of all to hear. And third of all to acknowledge and fourth of all to be curious about how other people see life because no two people are having the same experience. Third if they’re committed to collaboration forth if they are allowing themselves to be more passionate purposeful and see possibilities in what they do. Number five if they are committed to growing and developing everyone around them then they really grow themselves. There’s a big article that I could send to you if you want about the emerging leadership crisis that is occurring because sadly many millennials not all. They come into the world and a lot of us baby boomers have been the progenitors of this problem. They are not necessarily good collaborators. They are not necessarily good listeners they are more lifestyle oriented than they are career meeting they want to be gone at 5. They need a lot of goods. I’m not going to tell you what I what I learned. They want to basically they have to keep their passion and purpose. They need to be nourished and nurtured differently. They want to learn but they have an inherit not resentment but an attitude no prejudice that some of the older people don’t have value and you have to be able to there is a word for it.

Jay Abraham: [00:09:17] You have to be able to talk down to their level not try to bring them to yours or you’re basically going to lose. But I’ve been very very effective in teaching them how to be preeminent how to be wanting to really be a meaningful leader in whatever they do. I’ve been very effective at getting them to see that they have the chance to make differences not just through their job but through what the business or their effort really achieves.

Alan Taylor: [00:09:50] We’re talking to one of the icons of the sales and marketing and traffic and conversion industry. I guess you might say Jay Abraham and Jay was at beginnings of entrepreneur was there and was involved. And so today we have him on our radio show. Thank you very much for hanging with us for just a little bit and you were thinking right in the middle of telling a story of.

Jay Abraham: [00:10:10] I know it’s profound. I know. I was right at the critical and you left me on the ledge. Cliffhanger.

Alan Taylor: [00:10:18] Do you remember where you were?

Jay Abraham: [00:10:22] So I was going to tell you that it’s not an ADD moment but two years ago I was asked to do something very profound in Japan and this is not tangential. They have a huge problem with millennials. Every year 35,000 millennials walk into the woods and commit suicide because they feel helpless hopeless purposeless. And we did a book to give them Passion Purpose possibility. I did a lot of reflection on that. I think the one thing you have to do with millennials is inspire them to want to grow past the rigidity of their current thinking.

Jay Abraham: [00:11:01] I’ve been blessed by traveling all over the world figuritively and literally all over in different countries. But I mean literally and figuratively and all kinds of industries. I’ve gotten to see how different ways people think how different ways Business is transacted. How different values. How different believe systems. And the more you can expand the paradigm the mindset the ideological what’s the word I would called the ideological. All I got to find the right word of a Millennial. The more powerful you make them I have a very dear friend who has a company in Washington that is very successful at its almost 90 percent millennials. He has a absolute full time specialist whose job it is to retain and to individually address what each millennial needs to make them purposeful to make them passionate to make them feel like they’re part of a crusade.

Alan Taylor: [00:12:10] To help them to the other side. You may say.

Jay Abraham: [00:12:14] To be part of a mission crusade a movement because no one has done that. But I find that millennials thrive. Nobody wants to be mediocre and nobody wants to be. If you realize it rigidity is unfulfilling expansion is intoxicated. The problem is very few people try to systematically and add gently and.

Alan Taylor: [00:12:42] Pig headedly. haha.

Jay Abraham: [00:12:45] Yeah. To Nurture a millennial to expand his or her paradigm to show them. For example you and I are talking and I believe because I’ve done a lot of this. No two people talking to each other have the very same definition of any word. Your definition is based on your experience.

Alan Taylor: [00:13:04] Your upbringing. Culture

Jay Abraham: [00:13:05] You’re operating that canvas that you’re painting on and with millennials it’s worse because they really aren’t trained to be great communicators. I have a millennial and one time he wanted a classic car I got him a 69 Pontiac Lamont’s convertible hot car but I never even thought to teach him to check the oil and he let the engine blow.

Alan Taylor: [00:13:33] Oh my gosh.

Jay Abraham: [00:13:33] He came from the era where he was waiting for the.

Amanda Holmes: [00:13:38] Update. Notification on your phone.

Jay Abraham: [00:13:44] The greatest gift that a more let’s say not wise but a more traveled adult can do to a millennial who you have to look at. Here is a sponge that has an infinite thirst but they also have an inherent distrust. Let’s say discomfort and.

Alan Taylor: [00:14:16] I think you’re right the trust is a big one.

Jay Abraham: [00:14:19] Well I’ve done a lot of work with people like Stephen Covey who’s the preeminent expert in the world on corporate trust building and trust is very different in its actual manifestation than it is in what we believe we think we’re trustworthy. But there’s so many dimensions of trust. And listening is first, acknowledging, conducting yourself authentically not that talking behind people’s back. I go along and long for.

Amanda Holmes: [00:14:48] Or posting on Twitter.

Jay Abraham: [00:14:52] Yeah. I’ll tell you another story it’s fun. The millennial maze is to first of all gain their trust. And they have to see that your intention is their best interests. It’s not to shove your ideology down their throat.

Jay Abraham: [00:15:13] It’s not to control them it’s to liberate them so they can be so much more. So their life can be so much more meaningful purposeful so they can derive so much more out of what’s going on not just economically but psychically emotionally and physically because nobody really does that for them and I’ve been very blessed. I’ve done it worldwide and it works.

Alan Taylor: [00:15:36] If we don’t pay it forward and help them to understand what we’re doing you know and I’m trying to learn from Amanda Holmes who’s 30 and I’m learning more from her any day of the week than she’s learned from me at this point because this industry this world has left me behind. If I don’t choose to keep up with it. So Amanda I’m going to throw it over to you.

Amanda Holmes: [00:15:56] I’m loving what you’re saying. And I think it’s so poignant because building that trust and you’ve given us really specific I asked you for and you gave it right back you know step number one step number two will have to create a meme on that. That was fantastic.

Jay Abraham: [00:16:15] I have an attitude about millennials it’s very it’s not just poignant it’s it’s heartfelt. I think they are. Well let’s take a look at it. They’re going to rule the world. They’re going to be the leaders. And they don’t know how to lead.

Jay Abraham: [00:16:31] So they need people to help them not not criticize them but expand their paradigm of what leadership looks like what it means to collaborate what it means to inspire to develop to unify to collaborate and how exciting that is as opposed to intimidating. They need to see what an organization unified on a mission can do in terms of any kind of goal or achievement they need to learn to listen. They need to learn to appreciate they need to learn to acknowledge others and not to patronize or manipulate because that’s the greatest growth we’ll get because you learn by all the different realities one of the things I teach is the first thing you have to do is try to examine explore evaluate understand how every millennial sees life because that’s their reality not yours but it’s theirs. Then you’ve got to try to visualize what their day what their reality is like. Because you can’t engage you can’t. You can’t like double clutch and get into their life unless you understand the gears that are driving them. Next you’ve got to be able to have them understand that you appreciate and you respect and you acknowledge that you may not agree but that’s the reality but only from mutual acknowledgement and trust. Can you bridge understanding and guidance and you’ve got to be able to have them see that you are not critical. You are trying to really expand and liberate and emancipate all this greatness now is a big problem. The millennials are not only going to be the leaders of the future but they’re going to be the wealth controllers because we baby boomers are going to die. Sad sad sad. They’re going to inherit our wealth sooner so they are going to be the governing force of our society.

Jay Abraham: [00:18:39] And if you look at a governing force that most impressive ones the most impactful ones had advisers they had masterful thinking partners you have to look at your role as a masterful thinking partner. I did this will be a conclusion for you. I did an experiment a couple of months ago with a large group of accountants. Excuse my voice. We brought in two experts one to teach them how to hire and motivate millennials the other to teach them how to sell to millennials. Two different dynamics. But without those pieces of the puzzle entrepreneurs CEOs managers are going to be at a huge disadvantage. I’ll leave it at that.

Alan Taylor: [00:19:26] So valuable conversations like this are perfect for Entrepreneur and the Entrepreneur Network. Jay Abraham really appreciate you taking the time because I know you were here speaking on stage. Where can people find you on social media and the rest.

Jay Abraham: [00:19:42] The best thing for me it be to share is we have a site that’s quite profound. It’s called and it’s got 800 hours and 10,000 pages and it doesn’t ask for an opt in, it doesn’t sell anything. We’ve evolved to the point we’re benefactors to the entrepreneur world as a lot of great clarity and a lot of young and middle size youth and young adults have found great solace great clarity. I would recommend that and it’s not to monetize it it just gives them guidance.

Alan Taylor: [00:20:19] Very good.

Amanda Holmes – I’m Alan Taylor. We’re here at and traffic and conversion in San Diego. We’ll see you next time right here. Check back in.


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